I’ve been sick since the first and mostly sitting around on my ass doing nothing. I decided to make a goals list, even if some of them are extremely far fetched and will more than likely never happen…but its worth dreaming and thinking about right?
1) Buy or own a bowler hat. I have many many hats, but I do not have a bowler. Bowlers are sometimes mixed with fedoras, but I like the actual bowler hat better…
2) Become dictator of Russia. They thought Putin was bad? I’d be damned for the lowest pit of Hell for what I’d do my first few months of running the country. Many MANY men would be imprisoned or dropped in the middle of Siberia to fend for themselves. Plus I already have the hat…
3) Add to my heeled shoes. So far I have goth boots, goth boots, suede boots which need work or else they would look piratey, and some badass fuzzy zebra Mary Jane pumps.
4) Pet a boar. Don’t ask me why. I have wanted a razorback warthog or a boar as a pet lately. I think its to feed people to…and probably something to do with number 5… But not for hunting. Nono.
5) Get a gun permit. See what I can do about getting a pistol grip shotgun…
6) Try to stay out of prison and jail… It will be an extremely complicated feat, but since platypuses are real and be very poisonous, I can do this. 
7) Pet a platypus.
8) Get a mother fucking job!
9) Go on an epic adventure. I’m not talking LOTR or Narnia or Wonderland, I’m talking do something that leaves me guessing what will happen next in good ways and not fearing for my life in instances of stupidity.
10) Be a little bit more bolder and a lot more blunt. (AKA Do not talk about fight club.)
That is all.
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